Writing Prompt: Family History

 It is pretty obvious to any that read this blog, that I am at best an inconsistent writer. I probably spend more time in my  head then I do putting words down. My dear friend, Faye sent me a book of writing prompts over the holidays. She picked up a copy for herself. In an effort to get the words out of my head on a more regular basis, we are going to pick a new writing prompt every Wednesday and then spending a couple of days to do something with it.  Faye has picked this weeks writing prompt.

Writing Prompt: Do you know any interesting facts about your family history, if so what?

I am loosely interested in genealogy.  Mostly I like to know where the bodies are buried and if I ever needed a kidney, who to go to.  This means I have done a little bit of genealogy on both side of my family tree. Someone on my mothers side of the tree at one time was very much interested in genealogy and completed almost 8 generations  of tracking that almost makes me feel like British royalty. They included a little bit of history on the starting point of the family.

I think that one of the most interesting points in family history is that Solomon Scholl who is used as the starting point in the genealogy was a farmer, cabinet maker and undertaker. I have to marvel at the different career changes through out his life and it gives me hope that if I ever feel stagnant that I can dig up the energy to change my direction.  It also give me a laugh that I got into genealogy to know where the bodies were buried and here is an ancestor that literally knew where the bodies were buried. 

The Sad Cupcake

 You can’t be sad when you’re holding a cupcake. My dear friend Faye, gave me this magnet. It made me laugh and I thought it was the truth. Then I found an exception to that.  When that cupcake is a lie, the phrase misery loves company comes to mind. 

Welcome to a story about a terrible cupcake.

My friend Nic is a vegan. A gluten free vegan. Being vegan and gluten free is not a terrible thing. I have had some amazing vegan food and gluten free food in my life. While it is not my way of life, I am open to trying new recipes. Nic wanted to make red velvet vegan gluten free cupcakes.  She found a recipe on the internet. 

This is proof that the internet is a cruel and terrible place. They looked like cupcakes. They tasted like misery and tragedy. Of course I brought one home for my husband to try. After all, what if they were fine and I was just being super critical? (Truth: Misery loves company and I needed someone else to be just as traumatized as I was over the experience.) I have never seen a person spit a cupcake out of their mouth so quickly. My husband might never forgive me for the cupcake betrayal.

Things that were wrong with the cupcake:

1. Texture - It was crumbly yet gummy, like it lacked the will to live, but was trying anyway
2. Flavor-It did not taste like red velvet. It did not taste like chocolate. It tasted somewhat nutty.
3. Icing- The recipe had described it as tangy. Tangy is not something an icing should ever be. I am pretty sure my husband described it a barf. 

Lesson learned. Be wary of anything that is mostly held together by maple syrup, coconut oil and optimism.  Thank you Nic for reminding me that cupcakes can be deceiving. Happiness is not always a cupcake.

The 3 R’s

Happy New Year!

It is the new year and time for resolutions, reflections and relevance. 

You might be thinking, why relevance. Or your could be like, hey that is some great alliteration, but seriously why relevance?  That is and excellent question.

Several years back I was chatting with my mother in law about my best friend that lived out of state and she asked me, “How do you stay relevant?”  I know it sounds like a mean question, but it wasn’t intended to be that way. 

I have been best friends with this person since grade school and we have spent most of our time living in separate states. We grew up, got married moved to two different states and adapted to adult life, needless to say it would have been really easy to become a footnote in each other’s life, however we prevailed. 

The answer I gave, was that it was all about want and communication.  It has been several years since I was asked that and I still believe it is all about want and communication.  If you don’t have the want to communicate and put forth the effort,  then you will never be relevant. I think that there is nothing worse than being a footnote in someone’s life when they are relevant to yours.   

My unsolicited New Years recommends is to reflect on your relationships and be relevant to those that are relevant to you. 

Horse Feathers

I can’t tell if I should consider myself educated or just well read.  My husband procured a copy of Horse Feathers & Other Curious Words by Charles Earl Funk for me in San Diego, and it is making me laugh. 

Without a doubt they were loose with the “Other Curious Words”, since I don’t think that “Auburn” is a curious word; however the illustrations with the word make me smile and are a little reminiscent of Phantom Toll Booth, which was one of my favorite wordplay books in my younger years.

There are a couple of words that did make me scratch my head. 

 I think the conversation I had with Faye about the definition of huggermugger is more interesting than the word itself. 

Here is the definition:

Here is the conversation

Another amusing word is sesquipedalian. My goal is to work this word into my vocabulary in a grandiose manner this week at work.  

Albeit, my husband has perverse example to which that word could be used in, and I will not repeat it, but it did make me laugh. If it isn’t a hoagie it’s a hero. 

If you stumble upon this book in your travel, give it a gander.  It has amused me and is now a treasured member of my library. 

Odd Change

My purse is a bottomless black hole of weirdness. There is typically an assortment of receipts, lipsticks and fine point pens that live in the bottom of my purse.  Everything in my purse is normal, except for one, two or twenty things that I keep in the change portion of my wallet.

I have over a dozen flattened coins in my wallet. I keep them as a reminder of some of the places that I have been and that there are good times out there.  Not all good times have to cost a lot of money to be memorable.  

I would like to think that everyone keeps something sentimental with them. Check out my friend Faye’s blog (The Hook and the Pen)to find out the odd thing she keeps in her purse. 

Writing Prompt: Describe one odd item that you have in your purse or wallet right now. 

Grocery Store Mayhem

I thought she was going to throw a chicken at me. 

I worry. Sometimes I think that I worry for the sake of worrying.  My brain goes in circles and makes something out of nothing.  It has been six years since I last saw my best friend and I worry that we won’t be able to connect in person.

Faye and I met in elementary school. We saw each other everyday and had frequent sleep overs and joined each other on family trips.  Then I moved when I was fourteen and we have spent the next twenty four years keeping in touch through letter writing and sporadic visits.  The last time I saw her in person, was six years ago. A lot can change in six years. My head whirled over whether or not we would actually get a long in real life.  After all, how was I to know if I had some annoying habit that would drive her up the wall?  Maybe I snort when I laugh or twitch weirdly or worse yet, not get her sense of humor.  Or what if she licks her envelopes? What if we just can’t relate to each other?

Like a true worrywart, it was all for nothing.  We were in the grocery store, picking up supplies for cookies and the she threatened to throw a chicken at me.  I’ll admit I was being a brat. I was twisting her words like an angsty teenager in the middle of a story, and  I was working on her last nerve.  She threatened to throw something at me and happened to have a chicken handy. The crazy look in here her eyes and mirth around the mouth was a definite sign that we hadn’t lost a beat.  I told her to bring it. I was not afraid to get kicked out of a mid west grocery store I’ll never see again.  The kid manning the checkout was not amused with either one of us.  We were causing a scene at checkout number five and the line was beginning to build up. We had confirmed our friendship in the weirdest way. 

Faiths Knotty Designs

I am slowly coming to realization that I am terrible at writing reviews in a timely manner.  I feel like  Etsy is silently condemning me as my number of reviews stack up.  I know that some people find it silly to leave a review on every purchase, butI think it is important.  Most of the Etsy sellers are putting a lot of time and effort into a product and should be recognized for the effort they are putting into the creative item they are selling.  In short, I am going to attempt to write and share my reviews on my latest Etsy acquisitions. 

One of the most recent items I have purchased on Etsy was from FaithsKnottyDesigns. I have a love for jewelry. I also have a metal allergy. This can sometimes hinder what pieces of jewelry I wear when.  Large statement pendants are typically out of my wardrobe due to the fact they have a tendency to lay on the skin and not move. While I was snooping around on Etsy looking for something unique to add to my collection, I came across a beautiful statement piece. Not only was it beautiful, it was guaranteed not to give me the itchy scratches later. 

This statement piece is a crocheted floral necklace in a dusty rose cream color from FaithsKnottyDesigns.  The ordering process with FaithsKnottyDesigns was simple and efficient. They were quick to put the piece in the mail and sent along a complimentary chapstick holder.  (I am part child and promptly put it on my finger. It was a perfect fit.  I don’t know if it is good to have a finger the size of chapstick or not. I will dwell on this later.)

I love the necklace.  It is light weight and comfortable along with beautiful.  My only wish is that they had a couple more in their shop in various colors, because I think it would be a nice gift to give a couple of friends. Overall I would most likely buy this product again, and I look forward to checking out items in their shop.

Name That Sandwich

I am sure that I get the best ideas when I am on the tread mill or folding laundry.  My mind tends to wander and look for avenues to distract myself from what I am actually doing.  I was folding the endless supply of socks when some jingle on the radio made my brain take a left turn.My brain certainly picks odd things to get distracted over. Part of it could be that I was getting hungry, or that I have heard the same commercial for a Rueben on the radio over and over again and it made me wonder why it was called a Rueben.  

If you were to have a sandwich named after you, what would it be called and what would be on it?

With no rush to get back to matching white socks with a logo in one spot to other white socks that have the logo in a different spot, I texted a dozen friends to find out what would be on their sandwich.  The results amazed me.  I feel like I have enough good recipes to open my own cafe.  Can you guess who suggested what as a sandwich? 

Creators: Faye, Nic, Hannah, Barbie, Erica, Ken and Teresa

• The Outcast
• Ingredients: Chocolate M&M Cookies with dark chocolate ice cream filling rolled in black sprinkles
• The Irish Gal
• Ingredients: Slices of Corned Beef, Dubliner Irish Cheese on homemade white bread
• The Descendant
• Ingredients: Capocolla Ham, Genoa Salami, Aged Sharp Provolone, Roasted Red Peppers on a yeasty roll
• The Gaia
• Ingredients: Freshly mashed avocado with scallions and caramelized onions mixed in, sautéed portobello mushrooms, dijon mustard, roasted red peppers with Mediterranean spiced sea salt on Boston Bibb lettuce on a gluten free Texas toast that as a thin smear of basil pesto
• Don't Heat Up the Bacon
• Ingredients: Sliced turkey, bacon, tomatoes, spinach, red onions with chipotle mayo  on toast
• PB on PB
• Ingredients: Creamy Peanut Butter with Strawberry Jelly on a Potato Bun
• The Sea Pig
• Ingredients: Tuna Salad with sliced hardboiled eggs, thin sliced Black Forest Ham and thick slice of extra sharp cheddar cheese with a slice of tomato and hand pull of spinach and couple of spicy pickles on toasted sour dough bread 

Thank you every one that gave me a sandwich order. It sounded delicious and I apologize for not being able to use everyone’s response. I was somehow was able to finish the laundry despite the grumbling of my stomach and now I have a bunch of new sandwiches to try!

Haikus about Cheese

I was challenged by Faye on Twitter to write poetry on cheese, because there isn’t enough poetry about cheeses in the world.  Here are four haikus about four different cheese.  Please enjoy. 

Haiku’s about Cheese

Flowers of Rajya

Wheels of a yaks blessings

Bamboo basket gift

Crumbled Feta dream

Cranberry pecan chicken

Salad order up

El Queso blanco 

The subtle ingredient

Stealth flavor binder

Colby melting fun

The binding of bread together

Companion to soup

Favorite Holiday?

As the last week of September drew to a close, and the writing challenge  dwindled down to that last few hours, I had to admit that I was stumped. The last prompt of the week was to talk about "Your favorite holiday and why." That sounds like it should be easy cheesy breezy, but that is not the case.  There are 55 holidays recognized by Hallmark, and 11 of them are federal holidays.  That is not counting such esteemed national holidays, such as National Taco Day (October 4th) or National Coffee Day (September 29th) and Love Your Pet Day ( February 20th).  With so many holidays out there it is hard to pick just one and name it my favorite and a long explanation why.  

Here are my top twenty little known holidays that make me smile:

1. National Step in a Puddle & Splash Your Friends Day (January 11th)
2. National Kazoo Day (January 28th)
3. National Tell a Fairy Tale Day (February 26th)
4. National Open an Umbrella Indoors Day ( March 13th)
5. National Quilting Day (3rd Saturday in March) 
6. National Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day (April 12th)
7. National Free Comic Book Day (1st Saturday in May)
8. National Dinosaur Day (May 15)
9. National Wine Day ( May 25th)
10. National Best Friends Day (June 8th)
11. National Cheer Up the Lonely Day (July 11th)
12. National Eat Your Jello Day (July 12th)
13. National Sneak Some Zucchini Onto Your Neighbors Porch Day (August 8th)
14. National Video Games Day (September 12th)
15. National Ghost Hunting Day (Last Saturday in September)
16. National Moldy Cheese Day (October 9th)
17. National Cat Day (October 20th)
18. National Nachos Day (November 6th)
19. International Ninja Day (December 5th)
20. National Cat Herders Day (December 15th)

For more wonderful holidays, check out https://nationaldaycalendar.com/ for more holidays than Hallmark has cards for.  Good luck trying to pick a favorite holiday.  As for which is my actual true favorite holiday, I don't have one. I enjoy any day that makes me smile. 

Bored for Life

This weeks blog post is supposed to be about the boring job I ever had.  I am supposed to wax poetically about how I thought would die of boredom.  I wish I could say that I have had a boring job.  When I am paid to do something, I can find something to entertain myself while I get the task done.  It is when I am unpaid that my mind begins to wander and think about all the other things that I could be doing.  An example of this would be, Laundry.

It is one of the unpaid necessary tasks that I do, because I don't want to be wrinkled or smelly.  I think laundry is one of those things that just has to be done, but the thought of sitting and matching socks, makes me want to go dust something.  At least when I am dusting, re-arrange the toys on the shelf and sometimes play with them.  Infinitely more entertaining than trying to finding a white sock to match with another white sock.  Even talking about folding laundry is boring, thankfully the next blog prompt is a little more entertaining.  Next weeks prompt is; "Describe your most memorable family holiday, and explain what made it special for you."

Deathbed Confession

I am  running behind this week.  I was going to do a long post talking about last weeks prompt and announcing this weeks prompt and then things went pear shaped. Every time I thought that I had several minutes and the inspiration was with me, it was quickly swindled away by the distractions of the internet  or responsibilities.  

This weeks prompt is "write from the point of view of a character on his or her deathbed."  In my head it translated to "Deathbed Confession" and my brain started to spring into action on what horrible ailments a person could die from and if a person really knows when they are on their deathbed. I think I have myself straightened out and that I came up with something that does not have a person dying from eating expired Jello.  ( I spent some time cleaning out my grandmothers cupboard and trying to figure out the last time Jello was $0.33 a box. The possibility that Jello could kill has weighed heavily on my mind this week. I am not obsessed with Jello.)  It took a little while, but I finally came up with something. If you feel so inclined, below is my "Deathbed Confession."

Juliet

My gaze looks unseeing to the audience.  I was told it was the biggest crowd of the year. The last show often is, since family and friends make an effort to be there.  Something about it better to go out with a bang than a gasp. 

The heat of the lights are making me melt and I wouldn't be surprised if my make up is beginning to slide off of my  face.  The body next to me lies still and unmoving, but I can feel the heat radiating through my clothes.  A clattering jostling noise happens just behind me. It sounds like metal armor hitting a stone floor. 

Taking a breathe, I say the next line, knowing only two more come after it and then it is all over for me.  It has been a good run, though eventually the curtain must fall.  My time is up.

Yea, noise? Then I’ll be brief. O happy dagger,

I pick up the crooked dagger that is next to the body I am lying against and examine it.  I extend my arm out dramatically and say my next line.

This is thy sheath;

I bring my arm quickly to my chest and feel the blade slip into my bosom.  Blood seeping from the wound spreads.   With my last breathe, I gasp out my  last line.

there rust, and let me die.

I close my eyes as the rest of the world moves one. My curtain has fallen.

Treatment

Lucy didn't like waiting for the doctor to show.  Sitting in a thin hospital gown on the examination chair, she tried to ignore the way that the paper crinkling with every time she shifted. The walls had boring health posters to remind a person the importance of washing their hands and to check for lumps and there was no music. Just the hum of the air conditioner.  Lucy was trying to resist the urge to check her phone, to see how much time had passed, since there wasn't a clock in the room. She wished she had brought a book with her. 

Just as Lucy thought she was going to die of bordum the door opened, and the doctor breezed in. Clipboard in hand, white coat, gold rimmed glasses skimmed the notes on the paper before they focused on her.  

"Hello, Ms. Carmichael.  How are you?  I am Dr. Anderson. It says here that you have been having trouble sleeping?" Dr. Anderson asked, but then he looked back down to the clip board and read more notes.

Lucy tried not to shift to make the paper crinkle. Truth be told, she never really like going to the doctor, but her mother had told her that they could help.  They had helped her with the same issue and now she slept like a baby. 

"Yes, I am not sleeping well.  It is hard to fall asleep and even harder to stay asleep at times," softly replied Lucy

"How has your appetite been?  Are you eating well?" Queried the doctors as he made notes on the chart.

"I haven't been all that hungry lately.  I have been exercising. I have been trying to go for a run in the evenings to clear my head," nervously replied Lucy.  She shifted a little and the crinkling paper could be heard clearly in the room. 

"Have you been traveling or anywhere that can be crowded?  There is an epidemic going on, and it is incredibly infectious," warned the Dr. Anderson.

"I don't really go anywhere. I go to the book store,  I go to work, I go home.  I don't travel.  The most crowded place I go is the grocery store," muttered Lucy. 

"It doesn't take much.  It passes in the air and lack of sleep is one of the first signs. Loss of appetite is the second.  If this continues, you will feel achy and restless.  You will tear up at odd times.  Communication with others will be limited."  The doctor looked at her grimly.  This was the worst news.  Everyone knew that there was an infectious disease going about. She just didn't think it would happen to her. 

"Can this be treated?"

"Yes.  It is the early stages.  If you sign this consent form, we can start treatment right away.," advised the doctor as he flipped the page on his charge and pulled a piece of paper off.  Handing it to Lucy along with a pen, he started to set up for the procedure. 

Lucy looked down at the paper.  It was a standard consent for treatment.  Looking for a pen, she began to wonder what the name of the infectious disease was.  If so many people had it, why didn't it have a name? The milk at the grocery store even had a name. Daisy. Daisy was the brand name of the milk she drank, but this infectious disease didn't have a name, so a person didn't know how to avoid it. 

"I need a pen," stated Lucy as she chewed her lip, trying to decide if immediate treatment was the best action or if she should try and research other treatments, but first she would need a name of what she had.

"Of course, my apologies," replied the Doctor as he pulled a small hand drill out from the bottom of the cabinets on put it on the counter.  Pulling a pen from his front pocket, he handed it over to her.  Lucy tried not to look at the drill on the counter as the doctor started to pull out bandages and cotton wound pads.  The growing pile of supplies on the sterile countertop was beginning to make her nervous.

"Ccc-aan I ask wh-what the name of the in- Infectious disease is?" Stuttered Lucy, her nerves and fear finally catching up with her.  Her fingers tightly gripping the pen  as she clutches the clip board against her chest. She could feel her pulse racing as she wait on his every word.

"Oh, That is easy.  You are infected with Ideas.   You hang out in dangerous areas, such as bookstores and you think it won't affect you.  Your carelessness finally caught up with you.  A couple quick nips with the drill and we can get those ideas right out of your head and you will sleep the best sleep you have ever had," explained the Doctor with a wide smile on his face.

Infectious

Infectious 

The first week of the prompt challenge has gone by.  As some people may recall, I was instructed to write an article that would be worthy of the Weekly World News.  Sadly the Weekly World News is no longer in publication.  A current news source that reminds me of that beloved printing is The Onion.  My goal was to write something that would fit in with their type of articles, which is where the inspiration of Sarcasm Recognized as Official Language came from.  

This weeks prompt is a little more vague, which means the only limits I have are my mind.  I received a one word prompt: Infectious.  When I think of Infectious, I think of movies such as: Invasion of the Body Snatchers, The Stuff, Omega Man or even a relative more recent film, 12 Monkeys.  

I am not sure what I am going to do with my prompt yet, but it is certainly getting my head moving.  I want to wish lots of luck to Faye on her prompt.  It is about a different kind of infections. (Love.)

Sarcasm Recognized as an Official Language

Sarcasm Recognized as an Official Language

Sarcasm has been recognized as an official language.  Unofficals from Webster have started that language is a body of words and the systems for their usecommon to a people who are of the samecommunity or nation, the same geographical area, or the same cultural tradition, and sarcasm falls into that realm as a common communication utilized by those that have not leveled up in years significantly and is a faint cousin to wit.  Sarcasm can  be just as diverse and intriguing as colloquialisms, but with out the pretense of localism. 

Local community college states that adult evening classes are schedule to roll out with new semester to help bridge the communication gap between the five generations in the workforce.  Many have come forward claiming to be naturally fluent in sarcasm and have been speaking it socially for years. Teenager have collectively begun rolling their eyes and loudly sighing at the announcement.

Please see A Challenge blog post for writing prompt. 

A Challenge

A challenge.  That is what Faye offered me.  Almost a decade ago, Faye and I acquired a book of prompts called Writers Block by Jason Rekulak.  From time  to time we will challenge each other to write something based off of a random prompt.  Faye threw down the gauntlet and I picked it up. A total of 5 weeks with a random prompt each week. It is a chance to brush up my writing skills and break out of my comfort zone. 

First prompts have been picked.  I have until Saturday to come up with something.  An idea has been percolating since yesterday.  I can only hope that she has as much fun as I am on this challenge.  

Here is the prompt I have been given:

Come back Saturday to see what I have done with it. 

You can also check out Faye's blog to see what she h///as done with her prompt at http://thehookandthepen.blogspot.com/

A Life Lesson from E.T.

I may have found one of the ugliest fabric prints ever.   ET is a beloved movie icon.  He is also one of the ugliest aliens there ever was.  And now there is a cotton print with his misshapen potato like body and wrinkled face with giant bug eyes all over it. 

It is a terrible print.  I want to make underwear out of it.  My friend, Faye has an Etsy shop and despite my best efforts, she has declined on carrying ET underwear. It is sad that she doesn't see the potential in this item.  I am tempted to buy a couple of yards just to make uncomfortable gifts for other people.  I guarantee that it would  be a Christmas to be remembered. 

There is a life lesson to be learned here. I think that this is proof, that you can take something that can be considered ugly and turn it into something to smile about. I know I am smiling when I think about the looks on my friends faces when they receive matching pairs of ET panties.  It might be the most memorable gift they have ever received. It is all about perspective. 

Cast Role Call

Turning books into movies is a thing that happens all the time.  Books are used as original source material and it has spawned cinematic classics, family favorite and a ton of bad adaptations.  One of my favorite books, American Gods by Neil Gaiman was just adapted into a mini series.  I think the casting is spot on.  The actor that plays Mr. Wednesday makes me want to go reread the book.

Austin the cat is all cats. 

When a book you love is turned into a mini series, it can spark conversation of what other books would be fun movie adaptations or at the very least a mini series. One of favorite just for fun, need a good laugh books I like to reread in the bathtub is Summon the Keeper by Tanya Huff. This has been a book that I have bought for friends to share the love and the chuckles and is one of my frequently gifted books.   I think Summon the Keeper would be a fun 8 part mini series that would be one of those fun summer specials.  

My friend, Faye and I were having a discussion on who we would think would be awesome casting if we could cast whom ever we wanted in Summon the Keeper.  I challenged her for her cast list, since we were having a difference of opinion.  Here is my cast for Summon the Keeper.   

Cast List:

Claire -  Anna Hathaway

Dean - Steven Amell

Augustus Smythe - Martin Short

Austin (voice) -  Benedict Cumberbatch (If he can play a dragon, then a cat is a piece of cake.)

Jacques - Nathan Fillion

Voices of Hell - Bret McKenzie & Jermaine Clement

Mrs. Abrams - Carol Kane

Sara- Annie Potts

Diana - Ellen Page

Martha- Kate Winslet

Sasha- Helena Bonham Carter

Ron & Reg (twins)- Chris Pine & Chris Pratt*

Hermes- Simon Pegg

Zeus- Chevy Chase

Hera- Andrea Martin

Hades-  Ian McKellan

Persephone-  Una Stubbs

Amphitrite-  Wanda Ventham

Poseidon- Michael Gambon

Dytie - Lainie Kazan

Hephaestus - Brian Doyle Murray

Professor Jackson- Rhys Darby

Now that I have completed my cast list, I have to chuckle.  I feel like this is one of those trivia lists and Faye is going to pull her hair out trying to remember where she has seen some of these names before.  I can't wait to see what she comes up with as a cast list.   If you have a favorite book, or even a book that you would loved to see made into a movie or mini series, what would it be?  

*Yes, I know that Chris Pine and Chris Pratt are not twins and not interchanageable.