Satellite Girl and Milk Cow

Satellite Girl and Milk Cow

I need someone to watch Satellite Girl and Milk Cow.  I have some ideas about the metaphors in the movie that I want to bounce off of someone other than my husband.  If you haven’t seen the movie, then you might want to stop reading now, because it is going to be a little confusing.

Here are a couple of the idea’s that I have about the characters and what they represent. 

1. People turn into animals that represent their greatest characteristic
2. Ko turns into a Milk Cow because he is cowardly about his feelings and his actions in life.  Milk Cows aren’t especially brave or adventurous and run away from danger, much like Ko.
3. Witch of the North turned into a Boar, because while she is a boring individual with crass and crude mannerisms. 
4. Merlin is a roll of toilet paper, because even wise men have to deal with shit. 
5. Osajang  (Hunter) steals peoples livers, because there is always someone that takes advantage of other people for their own gain, and often times that sort of thing impacts the victim like a removal of a vital organ.

I have a half baked idea about the Furnace, but not quite sure how I want to word it.  When I have it all worked out in my head, I’ll come back and update this post.  Until then, what do you think the Furnace represents?  Or do you think that I am just overthinking it?

Sweater of Shame

Sweater of Shame

I am sure that any cat parent can attest that it is hard to teach a cat the difference between right and wrong.  Part of the trouble in teaching a cat anything is that they are so darn cute. They use their cuteness as a weapon to get away with thing they know are wrong.  Both of my cats know that they are not to jump on the television stand. Iggins, the good cat never does it. This is part of the reason he is the good cat.  Dib on the other hand, is smart and crafty.  He will jump up because he knows it will give him the attention he craves.  Anyone that has ever met Dib, knows that he likes to be the center of attention.

It has been a years long battle with Dib on not jumping on the television stand.  We have tried multiple solutions given to us by the mighty internet.  Try spraying him with water.  Dib doesn’t care. He will just sit there and take it. In fact he might even like it.  Put double sided tap down.  It works, but it also looks like and arts and crafts project gone wrong when it has to cover every single surface.  If there is even an edge open, he will perch a paw on it.  Shouting loud noises and tossing pillow at him also doesn’t work.  He looks at it as a game.  Dib is a stubborn smart bad cat that has way too much charm. 

It is true that when you hit rock bottom, the only way you can go is up.  This is the same with cat. I thought I had hit rock bottom and it was going to be hopeless, but then inspiration struck.  The Sweater of Shame. 

Dib hates wearing clothing.  When he was a young adult we had dressed him for Halloween once and discovered he was not keen on clothing.  Thus the idea of Sweater of Shame came upon me.  So far, this is working.

He hates it. He looks cute in it, so I am not compelled to take it off right away, and hopefully slowly he learns his lesson.  If he doesn’t then he will be even cuter running around in sweaters and getting away with even more bad stuff because he would be too cute to be stopped.  

My Brother: The Fixer

My Brother: The Fixer

I was originally going to name this post, “Ha Ha! Your Old!”  But it is my brothers birthday, and I thought I would be nice.  It is one of those significant birthdays, that well meaning coworkers, terrible friends and beloved family members send funeral wreaths.  It is a midlife crisis sort birthday.  I am the best sister ever. Aside from sending him random terrible gifts for an entire month just to annoy him, singing off key into his message machine Happy Birthday and generally being annoying, I want to share a little bit of nostalgia that every time I think about it I laugh. 

Mike and I when we were young and cute.

The Fixer:

All stories have to start somewhere.  This one starts with tears.  When I was in high school, I had a boyfriend and he was my world. We had plans to be one of those couples that beat the odds and stayed married for a million years.  We were the sort of couples that were almost nauseating to be around. I graduated a year before him, and was sure that our love was going to be strong to over come anything.  

I know your are thinking that this doesn’t sound like a story about my brother.  Hang in there. 

It should come as no surprise to some that despite all my teenage hopes and dreams of living happily ever after with my high school sweetheart in wedded bliss, it was not meant to be.  Unsurprising the proximity of our priorities and life experiences tore us apart.  

I, being an emotional teenager was distraught when the final blow came. Being dumped sucked.  Sobbing my eyes out and was pretty sure that I would never love again and die of a broken heart.  In the middle of this mess of teenage hormones and  general blubbering about how fair life is, with my the at that time best friend trying to sooth my wounded female pride, comes my brother. 

Mike looked at me, and my wretched state and offered his own brand of assistance to my plight. 

“I’ll slash his tires.”

My brother was 100% serious in his offer, and because of that I laughed.  And while it didn’t fix anything, it fixed everything. 

Happy BIrthday Mike!  You are the best!